This morning I tackled the trouser problem. That is the, wear a belt or show the world my knickers dilemma I discovered on the day of my interview. I’m not actually going to see any of my redundancy money until Mid April so I couldn’t go overboard. I did buy two pairs of trousers in Wallis though which set me back seventy pounds! That was as much as I could really afford to spend, especially after taking such a big wage cut. I’m going to have to employ my sewing skills and see if I can take any of my old trousers in for the time being.
Did I mention how much I hate clothes shopping? I know it’s supposed to be fun but it’s not when you’re a bigger woman. First it’s hard to actually find anything in the right size. There seem to be masses of things in size eight but start looking at anything above size fourteen and the rails are pretty bare. It’s strange the shops haven’t realised there’s a huge market for bigger sizes. I mean, look around, there are loads of women out on the streets who need plus sizes, it’s not as if it’s just me.
Then there’s the changing rooms. Wallis do at least have separate cubicles with curtains, not that they really hide that much, most of the curtains don’t pull all the way across and even if they do they tend to billow out just as you bend down in your pants. I took in six pairs of trousers, three in size sixteen and three in size eighteen, not knowing which was going to fit. Then I was confronted by a room full of stick insects with armfuls of tiny bits of fabric that wouldn’t even cover one of my bum cheeks. I slunk, shamefaced into the cubicle quick smart and hoped no one would notice me.
Two of the size eighteen trousers were too big and one was too small (how the hell does that work?). One of the size sixteens, in exactly the same style as one of the eighteens that were too big, was too small. The other two size sixteens fit so I took them. I’m quite pleased to be in size sixteen again, even if it is Wallis and they’re really more like size eighteen. It wasn’t that long ago that I could hardly do up Wallis size eighteens. I do wish the sizes were more standardised though. If it says size sixteen it should be exactly the same as all the other size sixteens, or would that make life too easy?
Just as I was standing at the counter feeling all self satisfied at the weight I’ve lost I had a back down to earth moment. The girl at the till laid out the tissue paper on the counter and held up one of my pairs of trousers to fold them. I looked at her, with the trousers held out in front of her and they were so much wider than she was. She and the colleague standing at the other till could have both hidden behind them and you’d not have been able to see either of them. I was cringing with embarrassment, I wanted to snatch them out of her hand and stuff them in the bag. That’ll teach me for feeling smug.