2 June 2009 – morbid fear of driving

What have I done?

What have I done?

The Driving instructor, Mike, emailed me back. I felt quite sick when I saw he’d replied. I’ve got my first lesson the Wednesday after next, he couldn’t fit me in before. I suppose it gives me more time before I have to actually get in a car and try to drive it which is a good thing, it also gives me loads of time to brood on it. Commando was over the moon when I told him. I knew he would be but it just makes me more scared. What if I can’t do it? He’s never said anything before but he really wants me to be able to drive. I can see it would take the pressure off him, especially as I don’t really drink, it would mean I could drive when we go out and he could have a drink. It makes perfect sense but that doesn’t make me any less afraid. A car is a dangerous weapon and I’m not all that sure I should be trusted with it.

Mac was pretty enthusiastic too. He started going on about all the nice little cars I could get and how I could do the driving when we have away days in the future. He even offered to come out driving with me so I could get more practice. He may change his mind when he sees how crap I am at it. Of course I may not be crap at it. I could be a natural driver, whatever that is, and just find I’m good at it and love it. I don’t know why I find that hard to imagine, after all the power of positive thought is a wonderful thing. I need to work on that a bit more I think.

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