2 February 2010 – negativity


Yesterday I was way too upset to get the Wii Fit out or think about weigh ins. It isn’t like I’m not upset today but I can’t use grief as an excuse to stop exercising or binge eat. Yesterday was all about crying and chocolate so this morning it was back to exercise and eating properly. The weigh in this morning gave me another one pound loss for last week, even with all that chocolate! I could have kissed it. I think I may actually love my Wii Fit!

The good mood evaporated as soon as I got to the office. I had my first one to one with Ali Rana. Basically it was a long list of things I’m not doing well enough.
“Your talk time is way too high for a start,” he said, almost before I’d sat on the seat in the pod. “You really need to cut that down. You have the lowest sales in the team too.”
“But I am hitting my sales targets?” I said, knowing full well I was.
“Yes, but barely. I don’t expect my team to settle for just hitting targets, I expect you to be exceeding them…” and on and on it went. “You should be coming to the end of your probation period now but, in view of your performance, I’m going to extend it for another month. If I don’t see some improvement I’ll have to consider your position.”
“So, is there anything positive at all?” I asked. “I know my wrap time is good, the best on the team.”
“Yes, your wrap time is good,” he admitted, looking like he was sucking on a lemon having to say the words, “but that doesn’t make up for the poor sales or the talk time.”

I left the pod feeling very glum. Another month of probation and then what? There didn’t seem any way I could do enough to make him happy. If I was top seller he’d still find some reason to moan. Panda, Primo and Rae told me not to worry.
“He was the same with me,” Panda said. “Talk time too long, sales could be better, if I don’t pull my socks up he’s going to put me on special sales training. He’s just a bully.”
“Me too,” Rae said. “Last month I made more sales than any other month since I’ve been here but he still said I could do better. He probably told Masher he could do better even though he’s top sales in the building. Just ignore him.”
“He’s full of shit. He can’t sack you as long as you hit your targets,” Primo said, “and you are hitting your targets. Ok, so your talk time is a little high but that’s expected, you’ve only been on the team since November, these things take time. Panda’s right, he’s just a bully.”

It did make me feel better, a bit, but, quite frankly, if he sacked me he’d be doing me a favour. This job sucks and life is too short.

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